When you are angry or deeply hurt, you may blow small problems out of proportion. Just as love sometimes clouds our objectivity, hurt and anger have a similar effect too. You may be tempted to ask a friend or a close relative to interfere or “make the other person see the sense of your argument”, but remember this approach can easily backfire as friends and relatives may not be objective and biased towards you. It’s therefore advisable to seek relationship counseling if both you and your partner are open to the idea. You may feel hesitant about confiding in a stranger, but remember a counselor is not just a stranger but a trained therapist. Just like you go to a doctor to treat an illness, you can visit a relationship counselor to treat your ailing
I think this is fantastic advice in a couple of different ways. First of all, it is very true that involving friends and family in your arguments, whether on one side or as a mediator, is not a good idea. You interact with this person on a very consistent basis and may feel uncomfortable being totally open and honest in the conversation. That person will also feel some pressure when put into the situation since they will know things nobody else does.
Trained professionals are available to help people through tough relationships. Everything in life needs to be taught, yet we continue to think our love life is something we should just "know" how to deal with. Being in a relationship is more than just lovey dovey fun - it's hard work, and it requires sacrifice and self-control. By visiting a counselor or even just a mediator, you will see that even relationships require a bit of guidance and assitance along the way.
Registered: 07-19-2020 Location: St. Louis MO
posted on 07-30-2020 at 13:03
Relationship advice and using counselling
I went through more than a few rough spots with my ex-wife when we were married way back when. We took the counselling thing twice, each time with a different counsellor. The first counsellor was a female of about 60 years old and she was really good. I still think of things she suggested for mental/emotional health. One was sort of religious but always gives me a better perspective on problems. It was, Gods thoughts of us are of peace, so anything that is not of peace is not from the thoughts of God.
We moved to another state a few years later and decided to try a counsellor in the new area. He was mid thirties and so opinionated with his knowledge that it was a waste of time.
What I am getting at is that counselling is similar to looking for a good mechanic. Not all mechanics are good. Not all counsellors are good. Just because the man or woman behind the desk has a degree doesn't mean they are going to do good work. So be forewarned about counsellors. If it doesn't feel right, don't waste the time and money on them or believe that they have a magic wand that lights up and fires off sparks of enlightenment.
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